We’ve noticed that a lot of men who come and see us can be a bit uncomfortable at the start, or wary of this whole ‘talk therapy’ thing (aka counselling or coaching). So to help guys feel more at ease and encourage them to look after themselves and reach out, we’ve put together this FAQ that explains a bit more about how we work here at Flow Life Coaching & Counselling.
What guys often say at the start of their first session:
“I don’t really know how this goes – do I just start talking?”
“I never thought I’d come to something like this but I’ve got some stuff going on…”
“I’m no good at talking about feelings – that’s not something I grew up doing.”
What guys often say at the end of their first session:
“I’m so glad I finally clicked that “book” button – to be honest I was kind of nervous you’d be judgey!”
“I feel way better just getting this off my chest.”
“Thanks so much, I feel like I’ve got an action plan now to get on top of this stuff.”
The most frequent comment we get from any type of client:
“I should have done this AGES ago!”
Counselling and Coaching for Men: an FAQ
Do guys really go to counselling or coaching?
They sure do! About 50% of our clients are men, which is awesome!
Here are some of the Kiwi blokes famous for using and recommending talk therapy:
- John Kirwan
- Graeme Henry
- Mike King
- Oscar Kightely (Bro’ Town, Sione’s Wedding)
- Greg Murphy (racecar driver)
- Andrew Mulligan (host of the Morning Rumble on The Rock FM, and Sky Sport’s Crowd Goes Wild)
Shouldn’t I just be able to deal with stuff myself? It seems a bit weak to ask for help with daily life.
Is it weak to hire an electrician to rewire your house? Or to see a doctor when you’re injured? Talk therapy is just the same: we’re specialists who help ‘get the job done’ so you can move forward with your life the way you want to. Human thoughts and feelings are bloody complicated(!) and when we are stuck in a rut it really helps to see a professional.
Do I have to open up right away? I don’t want to feel pressured.
We understand – we’re here to listen and we can explore issues and strategies for change at a pace that’s right for you.
First sessions are generally you sharing your story and what’s going on for you at the moment, and us listening to understand your situation and identify how we can help going forwards.
Clients often feel a weight has lifted after they have been able to confide in someone neutral and supportive.
A big part of our work is creating a space that you can feel comfortable in. Sessions are tailored to your needs. Whether you’re dealing with anxiety, stress, relationship or family issues, past unresolved experiences, work stuff, or wanting to build stronger self esteem.
What if I’m no good at talking about emotions? Is there any point in trying this?
If this sounds like you then that’s great: you’ll actually get even more from our sessions together.
Not only can we help with you feeling better and more in control of life, but you’ll also learn better ways of communicating that can help you in every area of life: work, relationships, parenting, etc.
Can a female counsellor/coach really help with guy stuff?
We sure can! We’ve helped many clients both men and women achieve happier lives, and about half of these have been blokes, so there’s not much you could run past us that we haven’t already been able to help guys with (yes, even sex issues). We’re down to earth and call it like we see it.
Our clients span from across the trades and professions and we work with people from New Zealand and across many cultures. Whoever shows up in our offices is guaranteed a warm welcome.
If I come to a couple’s counselling session will it just be you and my partner ganging up on me?
No (pinky promise). Our relationship counselling isn’t about deciding a winner or getting someone to shut up and put up with something – it’s about fixing the unhealthy patterns and upskilling to build an awesome relationship you can both be happy in. We are just as keen to help you as we are your partner. The only side we’re on is that of the relationship. Learn more about relationship counselling here.
If you have any other questions feel free to get in touch. We look forward to working with you.